Sunday, October 6, 2013

New

  1. Sometimes the old is new. I found a bunch of pictures. I haven't seen in ages. I took all of  them but the minute I see them my mind is flooded of great memories Funny this is most of these are in California. A happy place  for them and me! Each step in my kiddos life is. A new step.  My little kids are newly in a new stage of life. I'm blessed 



These kids are growing up












Thursday, October 3, 2013

SHARING

SHARING IS GOOD. ( and sometimes not so much)

 I have found my self in my old age :) more conscious of this verb.

As my summer pressed on and the questions and comments and concerns became more evident of the true love my favorite people had for me, I really reevaluated my favorite people and how much that helps recovery and gives you strength. I was overwhelmed by the kindness of the people in this world that i know. I actually was surprised by others I really thought were my peeps and reality sets in they are not.  Life is to short to let that ugly sadness sit, so today I share my love and gratefulness for my life.  The one that my sweetheart and sweet children  have given me. All the others are extra gravy!  I found a way to share my gratitude for those who have allowed me to be a part of their lives.... Stay tuned

Tuesday, September 24, 2013

No more

no more stitches ..... i hope.  there was 21 stitches on the outsid and 30 on the inside, and those have been slowly making their way out.  I pulled on last night.  the inscision sight on my face is healing, glad, can't wait til it's feeling normal ( it had no feeling rightnow because all the nerves are asleep they said for a few months.)

Wednesday, September 11, 2013

the big c word

I had struggled for a while to tell anyone and especially put it on Facebook or Instagram because it was a personal thing.  Different things were told and I wanted the truth to be told. I am so thankful for this experience I've had and that it has had a good out come. It was inconvenient because I did not have time to deal with it. But I made the time begrudegenly. 

  In January I noticed something on my face. Looked like a zit but would heal.  I ignored it and ignored it but i dint really think it was cancer.  I am talking about a tiny sore.  Like the size of a ball point pen mark.
Before any thing.  Looks like nothing. 
June 26th 2013
Marked for the first biopsy
July 9th 2013

After 6 biopsies on my face
July 9th 2013


So I headed off to Girls Camp and a friend said that looks like cancer.  then the next day another friend said that looks like cancer.  I don't know if it was the elevation or what but it would bleed and it was swollen.  We got home from camp Thursday and Friday I made an appt with a Dermatologist that came highly recommended.  My appt was 2 months out.  Well over the weekend I got more and more worried so I called and told them" my dad had this, my sister had this 2 months before!"  they scheduled me for the next week and I went in to get looked at.  She found 9 spots of concern. 6 on my face, 2 on my left leg and 1 on my right thigh.  The next week we were headed to Newport Beach so I pushed the biopsies out another week.  July 8th I had my first of 5 procedures. August 8th was the last of getting all the cancer.  The morning was getting the tumor out with MOHS Surgery.  and then off to get reconstructed from the defect. the ball point pen size was actually a huge tumor that had grown underneath the skin and was over an inch in diameter all the way around. I had a huge hole in my head and was told I had an 80% chance of the tumor growing to a point of me loosing my left eye. Dave and I were scared with the reality when the surgeon said, "I'm so sorry you have Cancer." I don't think people take skin cancer serious. I know I didn't completely. Telling the kids was very hard and we didn't for a few weeks until we figured everything out.

 Long story short.  It was CANCER.


Day 1 August 8th
Numbing  Worst part of the whole day!!! I was a awake for the tumor removal  Dave said the smoking and burning coming from my face was hard to watch as they cauterized it. Gross..

Here is the whole in my head. Sorry graphic.  you can see tendon, muscle fat.  
It was 1 inch by 1 inch 

Cancer Free!! 

Headed to the plastic surgeon in Scottsdale for my 1 sided facelift. :) 



                           +
 After Surgery.  

21 stitches on the outside and 29 in. 50 stitches

I had 11 removed many years ago, 4 with cancer and no major effects.

This time was different.... very different


 Long story short.  It was CANCER.  I have heard over the course of the last few months ( end of June to be exact) "It's just skin cancer"  Well I am the walking poster child that meeting with surgeons and plastic surgeons and dermatologists and being told maybe Radiation and Maybe Chemotherapy.  It's not just skin cancer.  It is major.  9 biopsies 5 surgeries, 1 being a 2 hours reconstructive with a Scottsdale plastic surgeon specializing in Ocular plastics. Lots of  bandaids and gauze and ointments, 100 spf sunblock that I have to wear forever now,  antibiotics and pain meds and almost $40k (before insurance).  It's not just skin cancer.  It's very treatable, if caught early but it's cancer.  My life has changed.  I have a 96% chance that within 5 years more of this cancer Basal Cell Carcinoma will show up in other places.  I have long sleeve swim wear and big hats.  This spot I had never sees the sun. It's covered by my big sunnies. I always wear sunscreen.  I still got cancer. I thought it was a zit or ingrown hair.  These pictures tell the story better than I can.
Around day 14

Day 2

Day 20th  Stitches opened up






Day 5

Day 12

I am so blessed to have so many amazing people to help me in this time of need.  2 months of surgeries and recovering, still have a few weeks til I am cleared for regular things but meals, cards, calls, service.  thanks so much for the kindness given on my behalf.
Day 30


Day 34 September 10, 2013



Now go get your skin checked!

Thursday, June 6, 2013

I love to see...

Oh how I love to see the temple!

Wednesday, June 5, 2013

Tink had to make a photo collage for one of her last projects. She took the pictures and I am impressed!  She chose my garden.   I love that she chose this because she was amazed as to what great pics she took which made it all the more fun!  I love what a great picture can capture!


Tuesday, May 7, 2013

How do you know?

                

How do you know that he loves you....... Remember this song from Enchanted with the dreamy Patrick Dempsey and Amy Adams.   She sings this song  and I love it.  I have it on my play list when Iwork out.  Its a fun song!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2MQsvpPWGmk
 

Well last night for Family Home Evening, I saw even more "how I Know that he loves me."  My sweetheart always says the sweetest things to me, about me.  He loves me, but last night as he taught the kids and myself our lesson he read from the scriptures and said, it is a Commandment to honor your mother and father.   Dave said, your mom is the most important thing to me and should be to you guys too.  He cried, I cried, my kids saw, which they have many times before.... He loves me.   

He was talking about me, he said it has nothing to do with the fact that Mother's Day/ Birthday are coming.  He is the sweetest man.     I love that he bore his testimony Sunday, and cried as he talked about me.  He said" I can't even look at her because i will cry"..  He was already crying. He is tender and kind, and not perfect at all but he strives to be.  and I know that he loves me! 

Sunday, April 7, 2013

California




The California Poppies were breathtaking. I have never seen so many in one place and so vivid. They looked fake.

My first visit to this temple was the beginning of my conversion story.  I looked at this sign and remembered that I said many years ago.  That I would go there someday!  I did and this sign means the world to me.


I don't know who took this but i dont like pics of me.
 I am the ph0tographer taking ever one else. not me.
my little little loves




we always right our name in the sand when we are there.

                             these 2 could sit and play in the sand forever and ever and ever

                                                                     my wave catcher.

                                                Until our next visit there...sigh...I hated leaving.

Tuesday, March 26, 2013

garden love....


i love everything about it!

I was out one day ( i am out Every day) and took these pictures.I love to tend to the garden. I pull weeds and water and eat from the garden every day.   some of the things I am growing right now are
red onion
green onions
lettuce
buttercrunch lettuce
romaine lettuce
spinach
lavender
basil
oregano
cilantro
peppermint
chocolate peppermint
rosemary
squash
zucchini
tomatoes
beans
snow peas 
snap peas
raspberries
radishes and watermelon

I want to grow more.  I can't get enough of it.











The Hoopes 5